The 15 Laws of Likeability

Over the past 5 years I’ve studied and researched why people like each other and why they don’t. To date I’ve uncovered 15 characteristics that make people likable. Here’s what I’ve discovered.

To begin, you must understand the overriding principle of likeability. All 15 characteristics fall under its influence. The principal states: “We like the people who genuinely help us like ourselves.” The keyword is “genuiely.” Anyone can fake likeability, and they often do.

As a matter of fact, the vast majority of sociopaths practice the skill of likeability without understanding why or how it work. They’ve learned through a life of trial and error how to act in such a way to get what they want from others. They don’t understand why it works, just that it works.

If you want to be genuinely liked by others and reap the rewards offered to likable people, you must approach each of these characteristics with a pure heart. If you don’t, you will soon be discovered as a fraud and treated as such.

Laws Of Likeability

    1. We like people who like us
    2. We like people who are like us
    3. We like authentic people
    4. We like people who make us feel safe
    5. We like people who get (understand) us
    6. We like people who elevate our mood
    7. We like people with whom we have frequent contact
    8. We like people with whom we collaborate
    9. We like polite people
    10. We like beautiful people
    11. We like people who we associate with good feelings
    12. We like people who are relevant in our lives
    13. We like people who make us feel welcome
    14. We like the people we help
    15. We like people who can laugh at themselves easily

      Stay tuned because I will be discussing each of these principles in detail in the future. I would also enjoy your thoughts and comments on the subject.

      3 Comments

      • By Telmo Martins, March 27, 2010 @ 7:27 am

        Hi. You mentioned “We like people who we help”, didn’t you forget “We like people who help me”?

      • By Bob Sommers, March 27, 2010 @ 12:01 pm

        Hi Telmo:
        Good point, but it’s not necessarily true that we like the people who help us. Many people feel obliterated when someone helps them. If you get a chance, please read my post on “We Like The People We Help.” It will explain this much better than I did here.
        Thanks for your comment Telmo. I really appreciate you participating in by blog. I’m looking forward to hearing more from you. Aloha, Bob

      • By Tim Francis, November 12, 2013 @ 5:58 pm

        I like you Bob Sommers.

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